Gil’s All Fright Diner is a novel by A. Lee Martinez, 2005. Review by Ed Wetterman

cover for Gil's All Fright DinerThis book was a treat. This book was not a serious horror, nor was it serious in tone. It is a funny look at two classic characters of the horror genre, Duke-the werewolf, and Earl-the Vampire. This is a buddy story full of adventure, romance, horror, and some of the most fun characters you can find. Here is the publisher’s blurb from the back of the book:

Welcome to Gil’s All Night Diner, where zombie attacks are a regular occurrence and you never know what might be lurking in the freezer…

Duke and Earl are just passing through when they stop at Gil’s for a quick bite to eat. They aren’t planning to stick around—until Loretta, the eatery’s owner, offers them one hundred dollars to take care of her zombie problem. Given that Duke is a werewolf and Earl’s a vampire, this should be easy money.

But the shambling dead are just the tip of the iceberg. Seems someone’s out to drive Loretta from the diner and is more than willing to raise a little hell on earth if that’s what it takes. Duke and Earl suddenly find themselves facing such otherworldly complications as undead cattle, an amorous ghost, a jailbait sorceress, and the terrifying occult power of pig Latin.

And maybe—just maybe—the end of the world, too.

If you were ever a fan of Douglas Adams or of Robert Asprin, you will definitely like this book. Several scenes made me bust out laughing and I was surprised that I really liked it. The undead cattle, the jailbait sorceress, and her little cult of one were too funny and well developed.

Writing: 4.5 Stars
Martinez scored with this book and I think it accomplishes all he set out to do. The writing is not superfluous, and he takes common ideas and turns them so that we see them in new ways. This ain’t your momma’s vampire and werewolf! I really liked the relationships in the novel and the character interactions were fun reading.

Plot: 4.0 Stars
The plot carried this book where it needed to go, but the character’s interactions are what really made this book for me. The young sorceress using her feminine wiles on the dumb jock that is her one occult member was awesome fun, as was the ghostly romance. It was predictable in some places, but overall this was very well plotted out and a good, moving story.

Gaming Uses: 3.5 Stars
This book’s story could easily be placed in that little old town of Pinebox, but it was a bit on the silly side too. You would want to make it a bit more serious for a true horror game, but there is plenty here to use in your game. My favorite would be the possessed magic eight ball. Good stuff!

Final Score: 4.0
This is a great quick read and a very funny tale. Check it out.

Ed Wetterman
12 to Midnight

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